I made this one by simply picturing the dark piece in my mind, rather than having it in front of me. This (unsurprisingly) does not work. It's nice and I like it well enough (which in itself is a good sign) but it's not as pared back and...arcane as the dark one.
Mostly the colours are at fault here- its' not strictly a white version, there's bits of pink and lilac which gives it a prettiness that I'd honestly like to lose. Fancifuldevices and I have been talking about the problem of pretty in our work and how we'd both like to put a sweet little pitchfork in it's brain. I'd like to make the paler ones a little more fragile and wispy, like ghosts. At the very least get rid of the pastel tones. Everything else I think can work without being sugary.
Please don't think I have something against pretty, I don't! I just want a more Dickensian feel in my work. it's a contsant struggle. :)